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About Misogyny in FFXIV...

basilchi8058: Love the ff14 community but like all communities, there are gross people who definitely need to be called out. There is no excuse to be a creep period.

grip7777: I'm a dude and one of the reasons I don't play higher level content anymore (played a lot in WoW) is what you mention here, and I'm not even the target so I can't imagine what it must be like for the people affected. I find it extremely wierd and uncomfortable when some guy starts to hit on a someone when he realizes that she is a girl and I would rather spend my saturday nights doing litteraly anything else other than being called a white knight for telling people off for catcalling online.

heickelrrx: I don't think this is FFXIV issue

I believe it is Human society issue, this is happening outside gaming as well

The root cause of these are rooted in fundamental complex society problem, some people have prejudice, some people taking advantages of the prejudice, causing even more prejudice,

I am not sociologist so I can't say much, but these human society issue is.. Complex

kellyderg7294: I still remember my original WoW guild, back in 2004, that was big enough to have 2 40 person raid groups plus all the logistics going.

And how it exploded when the guild leader forced everyone to be on vent and speak. Because they didn't realize how many women were in the guild.

I still remember the nightmare audio that happened when

"WAIT THE HEALER OFFICER and most of our healers are GIIIIIIIIIIIIIRLS?!" And suddenly the DMs and sleezy shit went from 0 to 20000% in a couple of minutes.

The guild completely fell apart, the women left pretty much immediately. (Because none of the women wanted to talk on vent in the first place because we knew what was going to happen), and the guild completely shattered to the wind within 48 hours.

It was definitely a watershed moment of "Fuck, fuck, holy shit"

PetrolJunkie: FFXIV is better than other games but it’s still a problem. The raiding scene has nothing on the club scene and RP community.

Izanagi-Arsene: my only gripe in 14 is honestly with the cliquey types, and by cliquey types i mean the ones that treat 14 like it's high school simulator.

admiralthunderbunny4520: My wife and I used to be raiders in EQ2 . . . while there are some bad actors in the FF community, it's a VERY small minority, way less than any other MMO we've played.

People just need to remember that there will be bad actors in every community, we just need to blacklist the knuckle draggers and have fun with the chill people.

katarh: My raiding static has three women in it. The other members of our static have all been carefully vetted to NOT BE JERKS about the fact that three of us are women.

khoiiifish: Apologies in advance for the text wall. As a person with major social anxiety, I actually got into ffxiv because I felt that its community was the best to help me slowly crawl out of that shell. And overall, it has! But the sad part is that only really occurred after I had completely finished the msq. When I was still a sprout fresh into Heavensward, I tried doing a dungeon for the first time with other players. There was a boss mechanic that I didn't quite get (and being a PS4 player at that time, communication was admittedly difficult & I don't fault them for that) and the tank absolutely laid it into me. I never expected to come out of content in the game crying, but I did. And I never played with other players again outside of trials where it was mandatory (and I dreaded them as a result.)

I left the game for a long while once I had just started Endwalker, then came back to it when I finally got my first gaming PC. And I remember that when I finally finished, I was happy, but also felt... kind of empty. Because I felt like I missed out on so much because I didn't play the game like it should have been played; with others. So, I resolved to go back and at least start with normal raids! And I've honestly had a blast and zero bad experiences since. It's really helped me open up and make more friends. But it's a shame that I was too scared to even try before I had already reached the end. I think most people have to realize that in any content, including high end, a lot of people learn best through practice. Even without considering the gender prejudice that is definitely apparent in some groups, people shouldn't have to feel too afraid of failure or harassment to even try.

SweetSugarCrash_: I am a WoW refugee who recently started playing FFXIV and the experiences I have had in 5/6 years worth of WoW still stop me from doing certain content, I hate doing dungeons with other people due to the abuse I received during my time in wow, I was only 14 when I started playing wow and I was going through a rough patch and found WoW as a breath of fresh air, and while it wasn't as toxic as it was before, I still received a lot of hate to the point where I wouldn't even talk in chat or mention anything about me being a girl. That's not to say that there weren't any nice people, I met a lot of lovely people unfortunately it was still dwarfed by people who were not so lovely. It was only in the last year of WoW that I started raiding and doing dungeons with guild members who I had known out of wow for a few years prior. they invited me to join their Realm and guild and were really lovely people, at the end of my time in WoW after I had completed everything I wanted and it's was just repeating the grind over and over again I decided to look back into FFXIV and decided to try it out with a friend who wanted to get back into FFXIV, I'm still nowhere near raid level, I'm only level 60 and I still haven't started the heavensward MSQ but I want to do raiding and enjoy it again as well as dungeons.

Sorry, I didn't realise how long it was getting ^ ^

ScottAdams14: In my opinion, part of the issue with the FFXIV community is that we are told all the time about how nice and welcoming we are, so we become blind to the areas in which we can improve. We need to stop this nonsense and start bringing our issues to the forefront so that they can be addressed by the community, and we need to be a little harsh in how we handle those with sexist, racist, and/or anti-LGBTQ attitudes by kicking them out of raid groups, linkshells, and FCs. Let those who deserve the community progress to a higher tier, and let the crap fall through the cracks.

Maldunn: I’m a guy and I’m intimidated when I think about getting into raiding and I don’t even have to worry about this kind of prejudice. We’re all humans just playing a game together for fun, why can’t we appreciate that?

Also just want to say that lala Avy is absolutely adorable!

FishSkeleton-: It sucks that people have to deal with idiots like this, but I guess there's always going to be people out there in every community who try to drag things down by making asses of themselves. All I can say is make real liberal use of the new blacklist features and ignore anyone who tries to bog down your experience, and report when things get properly bad, even if it sucks that you need to be the one to moderate your experience.

wolfethorne6446: I don’t really come across misogyny while in ffxiv playing a male or female character, but I tend to shy away from high end raiding. That’s not to say I don’t think it’s happening. I’m just not sure how to help the situation, other than to “try not to be a part of the problem”. I try to cultivate a sense of cooperation and fun whenever I do group content without digging into anyone’s background and being helpful wherever possible. As a guy, I have no idea if this is the right thing to do to make everyone feel welcome, or if there’s something else I should be doing.

Verdugo_Arulaq: There’s always those loud and obnoxious dudes in every crowd

I hate ‘em

aussiegirl10134: I've played multiple MMOs since my childhood, there is always someone who says absolutely unhinged and creepy things they wouldn't say to other people simply because I am a woman. The amount of times people were waiting for me and my boyfriend (now husband) to break up. I had someone send me real-life money to try to win me over. Another who constantly sexually harassed me and always said "It's just a joke." Then there is the backhanded compliment: "I didn't think you would be good, but you're actually good for a girl." I feel like there is this extra pressure for women to not cause drama or claim "drama" because in my experience it's always the non-male person's fault. For me, I would keep these things to myself to not break up the party and everyone be mad at me.

I have horrible anxiety when it comes to raiding from all my past experiences, even though I really enjoy end-game content. It's sad how few people can ruin things for others.

Sep 26 2024

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